I know I missed two days.
I’m human. I’m also sick, but that part is slowly waning away. The former I’m kind of stuck with ((Dear god, make me a bird, so I can fly far, far far away from here)). Now being down to the last few days of my winter break, I’m slowly re-gathering the responsible studious part of me that I threw off the side of a bridge before boarding a plane. I’ll have more classes than last semester, more homework than last semester, and more traveling during the school year than last semester… What can possibly go wrong?
Enough about me though. I’m not the interesting part. People are waaaay more interesting than I am. The way they see a group of people going one direction and will willingly follow without knowing any information beforehand. The way they pretend to be so many different people to where they almost forget who they really are. The way they shrivel up when they see my smiling face and I try to socialize with them ((whoops, did that last one get personal?)). It’s almost adorable. I personally don’t get it. Before there was facebook and twitter and cell phones and whathaveyou, people had to actually TALK to people when they see them. Like, for instance, on sidewalks. People actually said ‘Hello’. To everyone. Nowadays the best you can get a ‘friendly’ nod ((A nod? What exactly are you saying ‘yes’ to?)). I’ve tested this in many places and different times, and yes, holidays do change things. If you talk to anyone after Thanksgiving, some will appear bitter, most likely because they’re still recovering from extended family and whatever annoyances they come with ((or maybe they’re dealing with the ridiculous yet unavoidable Black Friday/Cyber Monday/Stillhavingsales Saturday BS)). As you get closer to Christmas, all sorts of reactions are possible. Some people have so much planned to have done before Christmas ((and most likely procrastinated until the week of)), they’ll just tune you out. Some are overbearingly happy you get the urge to strangle them with garland ((it’s incredibly convenient to find it considering they put that #$^@ on everything like it’s hot sauce)). Then there are the select few that are even more bitter than the Thanksgiving crowd because of more extended family for an even longer period of time. What’s even worse about saying hello during the holidays is the word choice. You say ‘Happy Christmas’ to the wrong person and all of a sudden your life is in danger. Nothing about anything should be offensive to anyone, in my opinion. So what if your Jewish. Say ‘Happy Hanukkah’ back and accept the differences in the world. Oh yeah, and forcing to say ‘Happy Holidays’ is no sort of compromise. Someone is ALWAYS going to be left out. Not everyone celebrates the holidays ((contrary to the ignorant belief of most Americans)), so just say what you believe and be done with it.
I’m going to do a thing, and this will be really good or I’ll be the most rejected student on campus. I will attempt to talk to someone new everyday, keep the traditional spirit alive. Most times it’ll probably just die away and they’ll leave without even remembering my name, but I’m hoping that at least a handful I will become friends with these perfect strangers. I go to school with 32,000 people around me, there’s no reason why I should close myself off. Maybe some of them will manage not to shrivel up under a pair of headphones ((is anyone else noticing they’re getting bigger and more anti-social looking?)).
Hopefully meeting new people will counter the woes of classwork that I will be drowning in daily.
Hopefully.
9 Hours.
That’s how much time passed from when I started this post to when I actually finished the damn thing. Now, I wasn’t actually writing that entire time. In fact, most of it I was doing something else ((at one point my computer was closed in sleep mode)). It’s not like it’s a crime to be a distracted person, but it sure doesn’t help a person in my shoes. The countless “Oh-%@#&!” moments just add a bit of color to everyday tasks. I’m sure being more focused is somewhere on that stupid resolution list thing.
Have you noticed how ridiculous social media has gotten? Word travels in literally seconds, and within an hour, people’s lives are grossly impacted because of a tweet or a like. It’s almost absurd. It’s even more absurd how it almost can’t be avoided. Some people, like those in my situation, have to have these stupid accounts or we won’t hear from those we care about most ever again ((which is also absurd)). My main problem is the mask that some people have to manifest on their profile to make it seem like everything is okay. If there’s anything I’ve learned in my short time of existing in this screwed up world is that everything. Is not. Okay ((unless you’re a unicorn)). Life happens. Every #%&$-ing day is not sunshine and rainbows ((again, exclusion to those of the unicorn nature…. Unless you’re a Harry Potter unicorn. Life still sucks in that scenario)). Yet, everyday it’s disgusting hashtags full of fake smiles and false friends followed by countless regrettable likes and half-hearted comments of celebration of their pointless picture. Don’t even get me started on the cryptic messages. The only reason why I seldom use them is because if I was my normal blunt self, there would be conflict, and some of these kids can’t seem to handle confrontation too well without crying about it on their other social mediums. “Why won’t he talk to me?” Who? About what? He’s probably avoiding you because of how vague you are in general conversation ((People don’t seem to realize that is the purpose of making statuses. They’re general, sometimes open-ended and rhetorical, bits of CONVERSATION to anyone who reads. If no one understands what the hell you’re talking about, you suck at making conversation)). I’m waiting for someone to say something along the lines of “I’m upset because William ((bonus points for tagging the name)) won’t talk to me and I feel like I upset him or annoyed him which really sucks because I really like him. What do I do?”. I would like the crap out of THAT status. And mean it.
I should probably stop ranting.
I guess the point is that most people who social media the wrong way. It’s not there to brag about how awesome your life is. It’s not there to plaster stress release through vague emotional cries for help. It’s there to connect with people that you wouldn’t be able to connect with ((as easily)) otherwise. Less pokes, more posts on someone else’s wall. Less likes, more messages in the inbox. It’s time we be people, not profiles.
But that’s just my opinion.
Hopefully this phase of self-centeredness weans its way out of society someday.
Hopefully.
*sigh*
Whelp, it’s 2015 everyone! Once again, another milestone ((ish)) has come along and once again I have the urge to get some consistency in my life. This being the Nth time I’ve tried this, I know what little readers I have are doubtful that it will stick this time around… and they are accurate for reacting this way. I try a new habit to build, It lingers around for a day or two, and then, by some overwhelming feeling of procrastination or any other outside force, *poof* I’m never seen or heard from again for another milestone or three. To that I say…… try try again?? Nth times the charm?? No time like the present?? Insert whatever cliche you will. I’m doing it anyway. It seems the only habit I’ve taken up is trying to make new habits… Does that count as progress?
Now that we have that out of the way…
HAPPY NEW YEAR! I hope everyone is having a good new year so far ((if you aren’t, that takes some true skill to bring down a brand new frikin’ year)) and that everyone has left their bad years in the past. Remember to make the most out of every day, make good choices, blah blah blah, and all that jazz. I’m feeling pretty hopeful this year as compared to previous ones. To put it in a metaphorical sense that you common-folk can understand, my life is like a football game. Every year we try new strategies to try to make it to the Superbowl but most seasons we can’t even make it past the first round of playoffs ((My damn quarterback is awful at reading the field. Every rookie is the same. All talk no follow-through)). Sure, we fire coaches, we hire coaches, recruit from different areas, but the result marginally changes. So what makes this season different? New owner!! New contracts all around! I’m sure some policies may even get modified for the better so the right player end up on the field at the right time. I see a ring in my future, dag nabbit!
Jokes aside, like most people, I have all sorts of resolutions. Most of them will fade by the end of the month. My one main goal, however, is simple and complicated at the same time: be happier. Too many times last year I caught myself feeling down, sometimes for almost no reason at all. Upon reflecting on these moments of gloom I noticed that there is too much in my life to ever feel down. Sure, I may not find myself to be the smartest, funniest, most attractive and amazing person in the universe ((except on Wednesdays. Watch out on hump days y’all)), but I don’t need to be, not for me. Perfection is overrated and impossible, and the world is waaaaay bigger than just myself. I now take that time to admire the campus, socialize with other humans, familiar and stranger, listen to music, or just do anything productive. Within my surroundings I find a way to appreciate myself more, and overall, I’m happier.
I also am learning not to take everything so seriously. Yeah, stupid people live and stupid things happen, but too often I would let the stupidity effect me too negatively. Life is too short for wallowing and woe. It helps no one and solves nothing ((insert catchy pop song about things that don’t kill you making you stronger)). I’ve also noticed the less bullshit I have to deal with in my life the happier I am. So I guess I could just say I only have one resolution made up of countless tiny resolutions. I’m bound to succeed!! ((I hope I didn’t just jinx myself))
On another note, I’m hoping to get back to my vlogs. I may or may not delete the old ones that are already on there considering how bad they are and how long ago it was. I have a lot of adventures in the near future and I would like to share them with those that cannot be there ((and anyone who would find it mildly entertaining)). More on that in the coming days/weeks/eons.
I’m too lazy to do the word of the day everyday. It’s too much to look up and think of funny things to say every time. I may do it as a weekly thing though, because it was a lot of fun.
ALSO! I would like to hear more feedback from whatever audience I do have this time around. Any questions, comments, or general conversation. I enjoy all of them, even if you are incompetent. Those are at least funny.
Well, I’m off to go do more productive things and figure out what to write tomorrow. ‘Til next time.
Hopefully, I get this year started off right.
Hopefully.
Sanctuary Of Solemn And Ecstasy* 